‘When Monica Met Hillary’ at the Colony

“I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Miss Lewinsky.”

We all remember then President Bill Clinton’s finger-wagging assertion – eyes blazing into the camera – when he began parsing words over his affair with a White House intern. (If you’re too young to remember 1998, you can find it on YouTube.)

Then came Hillary Clinton, standing by her man, stoically raising alarms about a right-wing conspiracy to bring down her hubby.

The embarrassing truth followed and Monica Lewinsky, along with her semen-stained blue dress, live on in infamy.

There is no evidence that Hillary and Monica ever met – either intentionally or by chance. So why would Winter Miller

write a play about an imagined encounter between these two? The idea is as implausible as it is farcical, yet it’s obviously provocative.

Could the wounded Hillary let down her guard and give Monica unsolicited advice about powerful men and their ever-dropping zippers? Would they find enough common ground to form a tenuous bond? Or would the former first lady and future presidential candidate eviscerate the young woman? Perhaps it’s something in between.

“If these two exceptionally resilient women do meet one day, I’d for sure want to be a fly on the wall,” said Miller. “But if that never happens, this play is a boxing match between two of this and last century’s most famous women on Earth, well, aside from Charli D’Amelio.”

(Who the heck is Charli D’Amelio?)

I imagine we’d all like to be a fly on the wall for that conversation, and now we’ll get the chance with the Miami New Drama world premiere of “When Monica Met Hillary” at the Colony Theater in Miami beach. Directed by Margot Bordelon, the production runs March 3-27, with an official opening set for March 5.

Promotional materials describe the story as such: “Girl meets boss. Girl falls for boss. Girl loses everything. A first lady breaks the glass ceiling ... only to find another. Monica and Hillary have never met. Until now.”

Of course, we all know that the complexities of these two women’s real lives have weaved a much more tangled web. Now Miller has decided to make them intersect.

The cast will feature Kyra Kennedy as Monica Lewinsky, who describes herself on her website as an “atypical, not-so-run-of-the mill, Oklahoma born and (corn)bred actress, musician and comedienne.” Portland Stage Company actress Danielle Skraastad (“27 Dresses,” “Law & Order,” “Hurricane Diane”) portrays Hillary Clinton.

Mia Matthews (“7 Deadly Sins”) plays Marcia Lewis, Lewinsky’s mother, who is remembered for rushing to her daughter’s side to stand up to independent counsel Ken Starr, even appearing before the grand jury after attempts to quash a subpoena failed.

Rasha Zamamiri (“#War Games,” “The Blacklist”) plays Huma Abedin. The Arab American actress, singer and voice-over artist was born in Kuwait and “raised all over the world.” Abedin was and remains Clinton’s trusted aide and advisor. They met when Abedin was the first lady’s intern in 1996. Abedin was later married to disgraced politician and convicted sex offender Anthony Weiner. She also got caught up in the FBI investigation into Hillary’s now infamous email scandal.

Miller is a New York Times journalist and playwright, and a founding member of the Obie-winning collective 13Playwrights. She has published numerous plays, including “No One Is Forgotten,” “In Darfur” and “The Penetration Play.”

“When Monica Met Hillary” features scenic design by Reid Thompson, costume design by Dina El-Aziz, lighting design by Yuki Nakase Link, and sound design and composition by Palmer Hefferan.

And now that you know who’s on deck, let the games begin!