Biscayne Crime Beat October Print
Written by Derek McCann, BT Contributor   
October 2017

policeman_stopHis Own Renter’s Paradise

7200 Block of NE 2nd Court

A landlord arrived at what he thought would be an empty apartment with a prospective tenant by his side. Hoping to get the man in by the first of the month, hurricane damage or not, he opened the door -- only to find that someone had already taken up residence whom, he was sure, hadn’t passed any background or credit check. Man admitted he’d lived there for four days and that he’d entered by just prying open the door handle. It was that easy. After the threat by the shocked landlord to involve our police force, the squatter left quickly. The confused prospective renter asked to be shown something else, preferably with better security. Good time to ask for a discount, too.


Saving Up Those Personal Days

400 Block of NE 77th Street

Police responded to an alarm call. They inspected the perimeter of this building and saw a window open with that apartment’s air-conditioning unit pushed from the wall. The victim had already responded to the scene, and police let the K-9 unit inside, but the good pooches found no suspects to slobber over. There is surveillance video that the victim had time to show officers. But he balked at writing what was missing on the property inventory sheet, as he said he had to go to work. Officer encouraged him to mail in his sheet. That will be filed somewhere, of course.


Settled for Less

500 Block of NE 64th Street

Who doesn’t love those wonderful high-tech gizmos that make life so fabulous, even if only artificially so? Using the jalousie windows not too damaged after the storm, our perpetrator entered this apartment and looked for some nice swag. He didn’t find the PS4 Pro, let alone the original PS4, either. He did settle for the PlayStation 3, outdated yet loved by purists. He added an HDMI cord for good measure -- because why would he stop at Gamestop and get one anyway? No other items were taken.


The Storm Before Irma

4500 N. Miami Ave.

Before the big storm, this victim found that the locks and chains had been ripped off his front door. A mystery intruder had made entry into his home, taking many personal belongings. An AC unit was stolen, as well. Windows were destroyed, along with the FPL box, causing a loss of electricity. Property from inside was also strewn around the front porch. Irma came later for good measure, but Miami’s special human storm had already, sadly, hit.


Can’t Miss That Entrance

5200 Block of NE 5th Avenue

Some burglars seem done with keeping up the mystery -- instead, they make their big entrance, even if they offer little follow-through. To wit: A couple of scoundrels managed to completely knock over a side fence, which allowed them access to the property. What a great entrance, making their presence known. They stole a lawn mower, as well as a boat motor. Not exactly the sexiest of items, but they weren’t finished. They broke into a parked car on the property and took the sunglasses and a tire inflator. And that was it, after a dramatic take-down of an entire fence. No arrests and no leads.


Citizens Take Down Perp

1000 Block of NE 81st Street

Sometimes a burglar hits the wrong house. In this case, an amateur thief was rummaging around the backyard area of a home, which caused a neighbor to look out the window. The neighbor notified the owner, who was inside. He banged on the window to startle the trespasser, causing the frazzled perp to jump on the victim’s scooter. It’s not wise to mess with a person’s bike, as the “victim” came running out of the house with a machete and threatened to cut our hapless perp into small sausage meat. Police arrived after the neighbor’s call, and our defendant said he was only looking for a lady friend in the neighborhood. He was arrested, and crack cocaine found in his pockets.


Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You

600 Block of NE 79th Street

While working at the cash register, a clerk walked away to check on some items that needed to be stocked. Multitasking appears to be a job requirement that seldom bears fruit. While he acted the efficient employee, a watchful thief reached behind the cash register and began emptying it of cash. Our employee confronted him, playing the security guard now, and managed to get all this money back. But the culprit grabbed the tip jar and made off with three dollars for his efforts.


Yes, Police Really Make Time for This

100 Block of NE 38th Street

A construction worker brought his old lunch box to the site (which may have packed a Twinkie and maybe a deviled ham sandwich). He left the box on a crate on the second floor. When lunchtime arrived, he went back to find that the lunch box was missing. He asked his co-workers if anyone had seen it or moved it, and they all denied seeing anything. He then called police and advised them that he believed an unknown person had stolen his lunchbox. Hey, if you have to call police once in your life, let’s hope it’s for something like this.


Building That Wall

6300 Block of NE 4th Court

One would think that a six-foot wooden fence would keep out most riffraff, or at least the meek ones. Nope, it didn’t deter this thief, who managed to shimmy up the fence and shattered a back window to a bedroom of this home. The subject entered and took several items, only to artfully slide back up that six-foot fence, and make his escape. We’d say build a higher wall, but that would just mean a longer climb with same results.


He Could Have Tried Social Media First

500 Block of NE 61st Street

In the middle of a peaceful slumber, our victim heard a knock on his bedroom window. Not exactly a courtship exercise here with a small pebble, but a large man named Erik, who’d been trying to get in touch with him. He’s an acquaintance. Erik went to the front door and demanded an audience with our sleepy victim. He was refused entry but kicked the door anyway, in a failed attempt to knock it down. He ran off but left a nice footprint on the front door. Maybe he should have accepted that friend request after all.

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