Calling All Writers! Well, Maybe Not All Writers
We here at Biscayne Times World Headquarters are looking for some new correspondents to supplement our stellar cast. If you live in a condo in downtown Miami (between the river and I-395), and you’d like to chronicle life in that particular frontier, we want to hear from you. Ditto for these areas: Edgewater, North Bay Village, Bay Harbor Islands, and North Miami. Warning: This is not a path to riches.

Please send contact information and writing samples (if you have them) to editor Jim Mullin: This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it .

Wendy, We Love Your Misery
After reading Wendy Doscher-Smith’s lament about winter’s crippling effect on her libido (“Eros Interrupted,” October 2009), I just had to write her this note:

Wendy, you cannot go back to Miami. How could you leave the Upper New York State triage of oddities and mysteries?

You will not find troll women with slippers big enough to hide a ferret, vegetable stands with a barn full of formally dressed mannequins, and the other assorted offbeat people and places that have made your life miserable while entertaining the daylights out of us.

Well, yeah, go. Be happy.

We will survive. But once in awhile we will think of you writing happy columns somewhere down South, about sipping rum drinks in the sunshine, how the light dapples the surface of your swimming pool, and about the latest mambo kings swirling you across some SoBe dance floor. And there will be bitterness.

Just go. No goodbyes.

But if you could give us just one more winter, just a few more stories of your fingers desperately scrabbling for purchase as you drag yourself along the frozen pathways, yearning for Cuban coffee but knowing that the only cup of joe in town is at the mini-mart at the Gas N Go.

Just one more winter, kid, and then we can go our separate ways in peace. Whadda ya say?

Lynne Merrill

Los Angeles

Wendy, We’d Love It If You’d Stop Complaining!
Wendy Doscher-Smith shouldn’t be writing anything. Her story in September’s issue, “The Grass Is Greener, the Mowers Are Louder,” was one of the worst things I have ever read in my life! Then comes “Eros Interrupted”!

She should go out and get a life instead of complaining about everything around her. I bet she can’t maintain a healthy relationship, because I can’t imagine anyone who would put up with all the complaining.

José Delgado

Miami

This Dog Good, That Dog Bad, My Dog Gone
When Lisa Hartman says that pit bulls with a normal temperament are “highly affectionate with people, even strangers and children,” I know what she means (“The Sweetness of Pit Bulls,” September 2009).

This past January a stray dog wandered into my Miami Shores backyard. I initially thought he was a Great Dane/Lab mix. Then I was told by various experts that the dog was a pit bull. He had all of the great traits that the breed is known for: goofy lovability, loyalty, devotion, high energy, and the sweetest disposition in the world.

A neighbor obtained a dog from Miami-Dade Animal Services that could have been the twin of my dog, and they certified her as a Terrier/Lab mix. When I tried to get my dog certified as “nonconforming” by Animal Services, in order to receive rabies shots and a license, they said, “No, he conforms to pit bull standards.” (Pit bulls are banned throughout the county.)

The officer admitted that by the old checklist, he would have been fine, but with the new checklist, his residency in Miami-Dade County was doomed. Why are they allowed to keep changing the standards?

As my dog romped, kissed, wiggled, and generally endeared himself to the crowd at Animal Services, I was crying like a baby. The officer apologized, as she said he was a great and wonderful dog, but ultimately her hands were tied by the law. I had to send him to a foster home run by pit bull saviors in Tampa.

My 90-year-old mother cried as well, saying she had never loved a dog the way she loved him. She is the daughter of a dog show expert, and as a teen had shown dogs at Madison Square Garden. She has known hundreds of dogs over the years.

We are still mourning the loss of Mr. Wiggles, the sweetest dog ever.

If anyone finds themselves in the same situation, contact Dahlia Canes via the Miami Coalition Against Breed-Specific Legislation as she may be able to help you. Visit www.mcabsl.wildapricot.org for more information.

The county’s law is ridiculous. Owners make a dog bad, not the breed.

Anya McCoy

Miami Shores

Memo to Media: Poodles Also Bite
I read Lisa Hartman’s “The Sweetness of Pit Bulls” and there is at least one point I disagree with. To the best of my knowledge, Italy like Holland has also done away with breed-specific legislation, which I believe is illegal and reeks of neo-Nazism.

However, Lisa is correct regarding media reports. Overzealous reporters appear to have only one dog breed in their vocabulary: pit bulls. If a Maltese poodle bites someone, they will report it as “another pit bull attack.” Some may call this media hype. I call it BS.

Selwyn Marock

Ontario

High Praise for a Low-Rise Boulevard
I disagree with my good friend Frank Rollason over the debate on a 35-foot height limit for the MiMo Historic District (“The Beast That Cannot Be Tamed,” September 2009). It should have come as no surprise that Commissioner Marc Sarnoff acted on a promise he made to a number of residents, neighborhoods, and homeowner associations who endorsed the height limit -- not just Morningside activist Elvis Cruz.

Where does the gloom-and-doom scenario come from? Lincoln Road, Miracle Mile, and a host of other commercial districts around the nation seem to do very well without the 53-foot, 81-foot, and upward of 120-foot heights that had been proposed for Biscayne Boulevard under Miami 21, our new zoning code.

Building heights played no part in the renaissance that took place on Biscayne Boulevard. It was the establishment of the historic district, championed by the MiMo Coalition and the city’s historic preservation officer that stimulated the change.

The claims that height limits will negatively affect existing businesses make no sense. It is the commercial property owners who are protesting. Those same property owners one day will most likely raise rents so high that the current businesses will be forced out in favor of large corporate concerns, as seen in the Grove and South Beach.

Commissioner Sarnoff’s action was made to protect homeowners and residents of the Upper Eastside, and to fulfill a campaign promise he made to them when he first ran for office.

Jack Spirk

Shorecrest

MiMo District: Kitsch Could Be the Key
I want to praise Commissioner Marc Sarnoff for standing by his campaign promise on a 35-foot height limit. More than a year ago, we in Shorecrest gathered over 350 names on a petition that supported the height limit, and presented it to the full city commission. I’m grateful that Sarnoff stuck to his guns.

At the same time, and to be fair, I understand why there is support for higher building limits in the MiMo area, as you need great numbers of residents to support local businesses. We cannot always count on people coming over from Miami Beach or other communities to support a burgeoning MiMo District.

The MiMo Biscayne Association works very hard to promote the area and its businesses, and let’s not forget that this area is trying to clean up a darker period in its history when the Boulevard was overrun with “street activity.”

Real estate investors want the biggest bang for their bucks, but maybe looking backward to something that was unique is the best way to go forward. Maybe we need to think about what MiMo could become if it played up its origins more effectively, flourishing through charming small hotels, lovely restaurants, and businesses that will create a draw, including foot traffic.

People in Miami are fickle. They are always looking for the next big thing. A row of wonderful 1950s-style motels -- decked out with neon, vibrant colors, and swimming pools -- might bring visitors in droves. If we can work together to re-create a marvelous and, yes, even kitschy gateway to Miami, the area might be more successful than anyone could have imagined.

Maggie Steber

Shorecrest

BT’s Strut Facts May Be Off, but the Parade Should Go On
I thank Biscayne Times for featuring Eric Bojnansky’s “King Mango Strut Strife: Not Funny” (September 2009). While some of the facts in the article were “off,” it captured the essence of our parade’s bizarre and unfortunate situation.

When Bill Dobson and I initially created the event, we wanted to bring a weird, small-town parade to the big city. We were able to achieve that for 27 years. But now it may be becoming something else -- one with a rapidly rising budget, jokes that aren’t funny, and one where any yahoo on a Harley can participate.

All we need to put on December’s Strut 2009 is $22,000. Would the fine Biscayne Times like to sponsor it?

The Strut may be ending, but hey, if it does end, we had a hell of a good run.

Glenn Terry

King Mango Strut co-founder

Coconut Grove

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