The Biscayne Times

Feb 20th
Biscayne Crime Beat May PDF Print E-mail
Written by Derek McCann, BT Contributor   
May 2019

policeman_stopWho Gets the Friends?

400 Block of NE 75th Street

Being friends with a couple can be a blast, but sometimes relationships end, and in Miami, usually badly. There were two break-ins of a home over a week, with the latest occurring on this day. Entry was made via a shattered, small window on the right side of a door, and the door pried open. So much for those pretty door aesthetics, Miamians: they just lead to burglary. A neighbor who knows the couple gave a conflicting account of what the female victim told police, rendering him not credible as a witness and in the emotional corner of the suspect. The flustered victim, after hearing this, left before ID techs arrived. Single life can be hard, as that ex made more friends than she did.


Crime Scene Contamination

3400 Block of Biscayne Boulevard

While staying at a motel on the Boulevard, an intruder entered our victim’s room while he was not present, ransacked the contents, and stole his Louis Vuitton wallet with $300 cash inside. Unfortunately, during a feverish 45-minute attempt to locate his wallet, he contaminated the room with his own DNA and fingerprints, which caused police not to bother with CSI. So if you find your dwelling disturbed, you may want to invest wearing gloves, or just call police, as Law & Order knowledge is not enough.


The Big Heist

4700 Block of Biscayne Boulevard
This crime was well thought out. Our culprit, armed with a pick ax and screwdriver, jumped on top of a Dumpster and, ankle deep in garbage, used the debris (he’d waited for it to be full) to pry open the second-floor window and made entry into the building. In lieu of the hackneyed office heist, where the money is, he went for the break room. He popped some microwave popcorn, then grabbed his desired loot: Gold Peak Green Tea bottles and Nestlé Water. The alarms had already gone off and police saw him running scared from the scene shortly after, with screwdriver and gloves dangling out his back pockets. The chase was short. The popcorn bag remained at the scene and was “processed.”


Be on Your P’s and Q’s

400 Block of NE 26th Terrace

At this rooming house, there is limited privacy and not even basic security. With no CCTV cameras and former residents having keys, it’s surprising these folks don’t appear in “Crime Beat” every month. We welcome you now. A tenant was awakened by another at 8:00 a.m. and asked point-blank where the television was. All this exhausted man knew is that he wanted a few more hours of sleep, as he had a glaring headache after drinking with his roommate, and falling asleep around 4:00 a.m. The television and the more sober roommate have not returned.


Break Time It Wasn’t

1300 Block of N. Miami Avenue

The owner of a bar was taking some much-needed time to himself and sat at the bar he created, sipping on a drink. That must have felt really good until he heard a loud explosion coming from his roof. He ran outside to investigate and saw a man on his roof -- and he wasn’t there for the beer on tap. Our victim yelled and demanded he leave. The man did so, running down NW 13th Street. Upon inspection, the vulture had stolen copper wiring from the air-conditioning unit.


Tip of the Day

5100 Block of Biscayne Boulevard

The next time you have that awkward moment when you want to leave a tip but want the counter person to see you doing so, think about those who do not want this transparency. A man walked in, placed an order, and took the tip jar without anyone noticing until it was gone. Video surveillance was fuzzy and could not identify the Flash that took all those one-dollar bills. It is unknown how much money was in the jar.


Yes, This Is Real

50 NE 11th St.

You have to hand it to Miami’s Finest at times. They respond, no matter what. This woman left her Dooney and Bourke wallet containing her driver’s license, debit card, and benefits card on the DJ booth at approximately 3:00 a.m. When she “woke up” at 7:00 a.m. outside the club, she at least had the ability in her stupor to remember where she’d put her wallet. But it was gone. She called police. There is possible video from the club, which will likely wind up on YouTube and not be used effectively by police.


Who Checks Under the Bed?

200 Block of Biscayne Boulevard Way
It’s so easy to blame the cleaning crew, but maybe you can also question your own common sense. A couple staying at this hotel left a stack of $20 bills under their bed. The stack just lay there, despite housekeeping having to come in, strip the bed, and then replace the linens. Lots could go wrong, such as that money winding up in a bed skirt, accident or not. When it was discovered missing, police were called, and with good video surveillance at this hotel, all personnel were interviewed, but no money found. They looked inside those big bins and didn’t find even a penny, let alone 45 twenty-dollar bills.


And It Continues…

401 Biscayne Blvd.

Police were called to a Starbucks after an incident involving Russian tourists. They were enjoying a famous cup of Starbucks java when they were stymied by the fact their black backpack was stolen containing all sorts of important items. I mean, why not put your important items in a backpack, leave the backpack on a chair, and turn around and forget about it like a true American? Police were kind enough to transport the Russian tourists to their hotel at the Hampton Inn. There was no known surveillance of the incident that is reportable.


Officer Writes Up His Own Report?

600 Block of Biscayne Boulevard

Our police try to live normal lives outside the rigors of their arduous work. This officer, in an effort to unwind in his civvies, attended a Heat game. To demonstrate his human nature, he left his phone on his seat and went to the bathroom, and when he returned, he had entered a “Crime Beat” blurb. He searched for that phone for 2.5 hours with the help of arena security. Numerous calls to the phone led to his voicemail. Phone tracker showed it was still in the building and likely one of the cleaning crew had it and turned it off. That officer is not going to give up on this one.


This column first appeared in April 2017.


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