The Biscayne Times

Aug 23rd
Biscayne Crime Beat September PDF Print E-mail
Written by Derek McCann, BT Contributor   
September 2018


Insurance Will Pay for Your Lunch, Right?

2000 Block of N. Miami Avenue

A burglary at a construction site has caused alarm, with the brazen thief seemingly daring to be caught. He pried open a door, ransacked the office, and made his way freely around the property. The kicker is, he took the time to feed himself from the employee fridge. A salad was removed, and the report made it known that half of this salad went missing. It’s not known if the rightful owner of that salad ate the remaining half the next day, or if it became evidence. The perpetrator even took the time to look directly at the camera at one point. No arrests have been made.


Some Shady Co-Workers

5000 Block of Biscayne Boulevard

One wants to feel comfortable in one’s workplace, no? It’s one thing to tolerate office baby showers and pictures of kids, it’s quite another when an actual crime is committed. This warrior was working past 5:00 p.m. and decided he needed a bathroom break. That restroom is upstairs. When he returned, his laptop was missing. It was a shiny Mac with an 18-inch screen. There were other workers present, but apparently no one saw or knows a thing. Our victim will likely not be pitching in for that next birthday potluck.


Bad Karma for Cheap Patrons

401 Biscayne Blvd.

Woman sat at the bar and charged her cell phone. The bartender noticed she wasn’t buying anything. When he confronted her, the woman said she was only there to charge her phone. That wasn’t happening. The bartender removed the plug and told her she’d have to buy something if she wanted to charge her phone. The woman left the bar in a huff and hailed a cab. She then realized she’d left her fanny pack on top of the bar. When she went back to that same bartender, it was gone. So she did pay for something after all, though it cost her a bit -- so let her charge that phone now.


Security Isn’t So Secure

3401 N. Miami Ave.

Man entered a Target store with his bike. Rather than secure it outside with a lock (which just causes a momentary delay; they get stolen anyway), the man parked his bicycle behind the security podium, in front of the two double doors at the exit. As he did his shopping, a thief went behind the podium and rolled the bicycle away. He was later seen heading westbound. There’s a video of the incident.


Clueless in Miami

3400 Block of Biscayne Boulevard

Man was eating at Pollo Tropical and had his laptop with him. He left the restaurant and went back to the hotel where he was staying so he could start banging away on that laptop. When he arrived at his room, he noticed his laptop had been stolen. He had no proof yet, seeing as he’d just left it at his table, but he had a moment of clarity, knowing full well that the laptop was long gone. Maybe if he’d hit Subway, someone would have turned it in? After drifting on that post-chicken lull, his suspicions proved correct when he got back to Pollo Tropical. No laptop, no arrests.


No Recourse

34 NE 11th St.

A woman was dancing at this club, and at around 5:00 a.m., a man shoved her and grabbed her iPhone. He then walked away. The woman was able to flag down security and approached the man, who denied having the phone. Without immediate evidence, the man left the club, presumably, with the phone, setting an easy strategy for other like-minded crooks to follow.


All in a Day’s Work

7400 Block of Biscayne Boulevard

A Postmates employee was picking up his order when he leered at the tip jar. Rather than just some dollars and loose change, this tip jar contained about $200. A typical Crime Beat bum, he couldn’t resist a score. While looking around to see if anyone was watching, he grabbed the jar and ran out. Efforts to reach the courier weren’t successful. The video, though, is very clear and the man’s face can be seen.


Overcooked Eggs Leads to Police Report

3600 Block of Biscayne Boulevard

Three women dined at Denny’s and ate $28 of “consumable food.” If you’ve eaten at Denny’s, you may realize that this is debatable. When it came time to pay, they all complained about the quality of the meal. The manager didn’t charge them for the food portion, but as he was kindly adjusting their check, they made their way out of the restaurant. The manager followed them, but to no avail. The three ladies weren’t coming back.


Intentional or Not

30 NE 1st Ct.

A man walked out of his office building, knowing he needed a cigarette. As he sat on the ground outside and furthered his health risks, he saw that his bag was gone. He’d put in on the ground as he lit up. He looked around to see if someone had “intentionally” picked up the bag -- we guess, to intentionally steal and use his credit cards, as opposed to accidentally picking up the bag and using the credit cards. He had his IDs in that bag as well. Thus far, bag is still missing.


Even the Side Pocket Is Fair Game

34 NE 11th St.

Too many people place their wallets in their back pants pockets; this is a goldmine for pickpockets, going back more than 100 years and, frankly, is just really dumb. One would think people would wise up to this. This person thought he had, and smartly had it in his side pocket. After paying for some drinks and placing the wallet back into that side pocket, he noticed that pocket became lighter five minutes later. In a panic, he went back to the bar, where he got a flashlight. He walked around the club with this flashlight but never found that wallet. Velcro side pockets might be the trick.


School Time Blues

500 Block of NE 81st Street

Man ventured into this store and grabbed a bunch of school pants and tops. As the cashier smiled at him and readied to ring him up, the man just left the store. He was followed, but he screamed at one employee: “Back up! Don’t touch me!” He then entered a waiting vehicle and, as the report noted, he himself was the getaway driver. Not quite the Dillinger variety, but a getaway car regardless. No arrests have been made, but some family will be well dressed this week.


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